“Resume”
Dorothy Parker
1893-1967 American

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

“Epigram”
Samuel Taylor Coleridge
1772-1834 English

Sir, I admit your general rule,
That every poet is a fool,
But you yourself may serve to show it,
That every fool is not a poet.